Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Dream a little dream ...

I had a horrible dream last night. But not just horrible ... in some ways fascinating.

We had to go down to Southcenter. I don't know why ... work? We left in the early afternoon and wouldn't be home until late at night. We had to take the bus. This seemed to be a regular thing.

I'd done it before. I don't know why, but I'd made this trip often. Once we were there, someone told a young kid who was doing the same trip that he wouldn't be able to get a bus back home (to our neighborhood) until almost midnight.

You don't want to be riding a bus into our neighborhood at midnight.

When I got back, Scott wasn't with me. I don't know why. For some reason, he had to leave ahead of me. Everyone was packing to evacuate. A war going on? A terrorist attack? Some global natural disaster? I don't know, but we all knew we had to leave, and permanently. Not a crazy, hurried mass exodus, but everyone just knew they were leaving. No one was going to come back to their homes.

I had to go - alone - to our house (it was daylight now - huh?) and see what pets were alive so that I could take them with. There were no dogs around. The rest were gone, too.

I saw our neighbors, Tom and Cathy. All their family were around, and they were cheerfully packing everything they owned. They told me that after that day, there would be no electronic transactions allowed. I wouldn't get paid until Thursday, so I had to make do with what money I had. I then realized that my direct deposit wouldn't go through, so I would never get paid again. I ran across the street to take every penny of cash out of my account to survive. It was only $275.

I ran back across the street, and wanted to hug Cathy goodbye, but she smiled and disappeared into their house. I couldn't find any of our pets, and assumed they had already died. I couldn't find where I had parked my car on the street.

Then I woke up.

It was devastating ... but I wanted so desperately to go back to sleep and continue the dream. I wanted to know the rest - why was all this happening? I craved finding my car, having enough gas, getting somewhere, getting out of the car and having the dogs and cats run towards me and hug and lick me, standing up and having Scott hold me. It was a dream that I should be crying as I wake up from it, but I just wanted to know that it ended with something I could live with. Something that showed me that my life was still together.

I want to know how it ended. I woke up, groggily, at 4 a.m., and touched Scott to make sure he was really there, and touched Kali to make sure she was snoring between us, and actually got up and felt around for the other dogs to make sure they were safe. I never did fall back to sleep.

I had an absolutely horrible day at work ... but not because of this, unless it was some type of premonition. Does anyone know what this could mean? I'm scared to continue this dream tonight unless it has an incredible happy-movie ending.


Scooter said...

I wonder if this has anything to do with Estelle Getty dying???

LSL said...

This sounds really sad and scary. I'm so sorry :(

Chris said...

I hate dreams like that -- they're so disorienting.

On the other hand, this sounds oddly X-Files-ish (the aliens are coming! the aliens are coming!). You didn't catch the weekend marathon, did you?

Paul said...

Matt, you need to get some sleep!

CJ said...

What did you eat, smoke, or drink, the night before? I hate it when people ask me that when I tell tthem my dreams.
I too have tried to go back to sleep and pick up and it has work on rare occassions.
I have awaken with my heart pounding so I'm thinking damn I could die in my sleep fom one of these adventures.
I don't know? Have you been under some stress lately? It had to be a great feeling to wake up from it though.

Anonymous said...

It's just a fucked up way of your brain sorting through the random stuff. I don't think there is always an intelligible meaning, I have had REALLY messed up dreams too and some of them involve my abuser's of the past, and I KNOW that those dreams amount to NOTHING.

I think it makes an awesome short story tho... Sounds scary and interesting for it lol.

Hope you get some good sleep from now on.

john said...

Scary stuff.