You Must Remember This.

“A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.” - Ingrid Bergman

In Which I'm Told I Destroy Marriage and Threaten Children.

Scott and I headed up to Lynnwood yesterday, to buy some more Halloween decorations (Scott has a problem) and to go to Alderwood Mall to find a few new clothes for me. Luckily, Scott has worked in Lynnwood for many years (although he just transferred to Northgate), so he could navigate us around easily - I get lost when I get out of the city. What we didn't expect was to come across hundreds of protesters rallying against Referendum 71 - which is on the ballot for next month's election to uphold Washington State's domestic partnership law, which grants state rights to same-sex couples and domestic partners over the age of 62.

We were enraged. Yes, everyone has the right to hold and voice their opinions - but this was unreal. Apparrently this group came from a Russian Baptist church in Eastern Washington, and has been very vocal in their opposition of granting us and other same-sex couples any rights whatsoever.

What really appalled me was the number of high-school-aged (and younger) kids who were out there holding signs. Yes, we learn values from our parents and families (most of us), but I don't truly believe that these kids honestly know what they're protesting against other than "people who aren't like us". That's what they are learning from this. It's okay to oppress people who you don't know anything about other than that you've been told they are not like you, and therefore not as good as you (or not good at all).

I know, I know ... I'm preaching to the choir, so why even bother?

Because in the off chance that one of those people who were carrying these signs reads - actually reads - this post, maybe they'll think about this.

Quoting the bible isn't enough. The bible was written by man, not god. There are examples (in the Old Testament) you can pull from it that say that homosexuality is a sin. There are examples you can pull from it that say don't wear white after Labor Day, if you want to spin it enough (I wouldn't be surprised if that's happened already). It's really about interpretation of ancient beliefs based on the time they were written. If those books had been written today, they'd have a different meaning. Depending on who would have written them. Interpretation is huge.

Securing rights for domestic partnerships is not tantamount to gay marriage. Sure, it may lead the way - and of course I'm for that - but you're putting the cart before the horse. That's not what this is about.

My big fat domestic partnership is not attacking the sanctity of your opposite-sex marriage. You can be opposite-married all you want. If Scott and I being together has attacked your marriage or any others', there are much bigger fish to fry. Look in the mirror.

Feel an overwhelming need to preserve and protect marriage? Make divorce illegal. I'd be out marching and waving signs for that in a heartbeat.

Think that the very idea of same-sex couples harms children? How? Do a Google search on the percentage of child molesters who are straight.

Think that the way that homosexuality - and same-sex partnerhips - would harm children is that all children will be required to view explicit homosexual pornography in schools and libraries (yes, this is actually an argument that comes up time and time again)? Where did you get that idea? Please tell me where in Referendum 71 this is shown.

Please, those of you who are against these basic civil rights for us - come to my neighborhood. Meet out neighbors. The straight, child-rearing, working and tax-paying and voting neighbors of ours. Ask them of the destruction we have wrought on our neighborhood and their families and their children. Ask them why they allow their children to trick-or-treat at our house. Ask them why they knock on our door when their kids want to see our pets, and actually let them come inside. Ask them why they let us go camping with them and let their kids see us holding hands. Ask them why they bring cans of chicken soup to our house when we have a cold. Ask them why they offer to let us borrow their mixer when ours died and we're trying to make banana bread. Ask them why they ask us to house-sit and cat-sit and bring in their recycling bins when they go on vacation, why they invite us to dinner and parties and why they stop by and talk to us out in the yard, in full view of the world, and laugh with us and wave as they drive by.

And then, look in the mirror and take a good, hard look. And wonder if your god sees them as less than you because they love and accept and yes, sometimes actually TOUCH us.

God Hates Pompous, Blathering, Hate-Spewing Inbreds, Too!

Guess who's coming to dinner ...

And two stops right in our own little 'hood, too!

Anyone wanna come to Seattle and watch? I'll bring the popcorn.

Why, More Each Day, I Will Never Vote Republican.

I grew up in a very white, homogeneous, upper-middle-class suburb of Chicago.

We didn't know anyone of a different race. The few other kids in school who weren't white were ... well, different. Not bad, but not us. We always figured they had their own friends, their own activities, their own lives. Different from ours. But we weren't all that curious. They weren't the same as us.

My family, like most others there, was Republican. I didn't have the slightest idea what that meant, but I figured I was a Republican, too.

It's funny now, thinking back to racist comments my oldest brother made once, how my Mom was so angry with him. We absolutely were not raised to be racist - but, knowing nothing else, I didn't understand why she would be upset that he talked about the differences between us and, well ... them. Those other people who had their own lives far removed from us, who didn't know anything about us, either.


In my adult life, I realized that my beliefs and ideals more closely aligned with the Democratic party. And, even more so, that I agreed with liberal ideals. But it's been in the last eight years that I've realized that I could never, EVER vote Republican. Because contrary to the party that my parents believed in, the GOP has swerved away from its' core ideals to the extreme right-wing, ultra-conservative, narrow-minded stereotype of what is the complete opposite of me.

This video epitomizes why I will never, ever, EVER vote Republican ... you can say this is the fringe, the extremists, the uneducated masses, the over-the-top right wing that isn't a true measure of the GOP. But increasingly, this has become the public persona of that party, and the current administration and hopeful candidates are doing nothing to stop that. It is ignorance, and hatred, racism, and egocentricism - and just plain stupidity. This is what I will always, ALWAYS vote against:

Taking Care Of Your Neighbors

Last night, a few houses on our block - and the reflector signs on the traffic circle by our house - got tagged. This pisses us off like crazy. The tags don't seem to be from any known local gangs, just random crap. It's just some people being disrespectful, ignorant, petty and childish. But it really hurts, to have someone deface your property for no known reason.

One of the houses tagged is right across the street from us. Two women in their 80's live there. Their house is modest, but always well cared for, with a neat lawn, carefully-groomed rose bushes, and small pots of geraniums on the porch.

It broke our hearts when one of the women said that she was worried she had been targeted for her race. She and her housemate are black - and while the neighborhood as a whole is a historically black section of Seattle, our block is sometimes called "the white block" by people passing by. We reassured her that their house was not targeted for any reason at all, that there were at least two other houses tagged on the block at random, and that it was a good thing Scott hadn't seen who it was or he woulda knocked their blocks off. She smiled at that.

We ran down to Lowe's and got some GoofOff and rags and a wire brush drill attachment. Then, with our neighbor George, we got to work. We scrubbed and sprayed and buffed for an hour or two. George's kids and some other of the neighbor kids came out and scrubbed with us. Finally, it was looking a little better.

While I was cleaning the reflectors at the traffic circle, a thuggish-looking guy drove by and said "That won't last, man". I said I guess I'd just come out and clean it every time it happened. But as we were all scrubbing our neighbor's garage, a young black woman (I only mention her race because of our neighbor's fear that the graffiti may have been racially motivated) walked by and mentioned how horrible it was that this house had been tagged, but how great it was that we were helping out by cleaning it up.

And that's what we told our neighbor. We need to watch out for each other. They aren't capable of getting out there and scrubbing graffiti off of their walls, but we are. You do what you can to take care of the people around you. Not because we expect them to do something for us, but because we're all in this together. When someone shows disrespect for our neighbors, they show disrespect for us, and we stand together and do what needs to be done.

After we were done, and had hosed down the driveway and promised to come back to re-paint the garage door if it needed it, our neighbor thanked us and wished us a blessed day. We knew that had already happened.

Don't tell me homophobia and anti-gay hate doesn't exist. Just don't.

I'm sorry, Michael.

From my Dear Cousin Jo

From: "Matt's Cousin Jo"
Sent: Saturday, February 16, 2008 10:58 AM
To: Matt
Subject: *crying*


Dear Matt,

I was reading a local newspaper and they ran a story about a "church" group coming to protest at the funerals of the Northern Illinois students who were killed. Matt, I have never seen so much hate filled people saying that God is with them. This is their website (careful, it's nasty!):

http://www.godhatesfags.com/

and this is their flier for the funeral protest:

http://www.godhatesfags.com/written/fliers/20080215_niu-carnage.pdf

I know that my God does not back anything these people are doing. Look at their protest schedule on their web site. Matt, I can't believe the amount of hate they have and the fact that they claim that God is with them. It makes me cry to think that this is the kind of thing that you have to face on a daily basis.

I commented on the newspaper website, directing people to the website for the flier so that people know exactly what kind of people are coming. These children who were killed and their families should NOT be subjected to this kind of hate at this time. This isn't God punishing anybody, it is the result of a boy who was emotionally ill. I am so sick by all of this, and it saddens me to see that this is what you actually have to face in everyday life.

I guess I just wanted to say that I love you, and I know the God I worship loves you, too.

Jo

From Matterdays:



Dear Jo,

Thank you for such a sweet and thoughtful e-mail. But please – don’t waste your time on these people. I’m very familiar with the “God Hates Fags”/Westboro Baptist Church/Phelps clan. They are a small group of inbred idiots who have garnered a huge amount of attention based solely on their ignorance and hate. They picket all kinds of funerals – from soldiers killed in Iraq to victims of random violence such as this. Yes, I face this on a daily basis, but not to this extent. This clan used to really upset me, but honestly these days I just roll my eyes and laugh at them. I choose not to have time for people like this.

I truly don’t believe that God punishes anyone for anything. Why would God create all things (as He supposedly has), and then hate and smite those who act on something He has created? The point of life is that God has created EVERYTHING for us to use, even if it’s something that can be used against others. I truly believe that we grow and learn and understand, possibly through many lives, that we are all a part of God and that he is experiencing every possible emotion and action through us. When we learn to use everything that we’ve been given for love rather than fear, then we are rejoined with God to know the experience of love. There are a lot of ideas that agree with this – even look at astrology, where different signs of the zodiac are “newer” or “older” than others. Scott has taught me about that – he is a younger sign, I am an older sign. Maybe I have gone through more lives than he has. He has more energy, I have more quietness. Not that either is better or worse, just different parts of the journey. And not that I am a patient zen-like being – quite the opposite; but we balance each other. No matter how long we are together here on earth, we’ll be part of the same thing again when we’re both through our journeys. We all will. Perhaps the person who shot all of these people, like others who have taken lives, is simply on a different part of the path and hasn’t realized the love and potential that life gives yet. Perhaps the ones who were killed also have other paths to follow for now. Even “evil” touches us and teaches us things. If things like this didn’t happen, we wouldn’t know the opposite. Life is more than what we are experiencing now.

Let the Phelps clan, like many others around the world, spew their hate. They think they are right. We think they are wrong. We’re all on some part of some journey and will get there at some point. And when we’re all part of Us again, we can laugh at the weird ways we found our paths. Everything we endure in the meantime will eventually become immaterial.

Well, that’s what I hope. But not a bad though, eh?

All my love,

Matt

The "Religious Right" and Hate: Is it Religious? Or Right?

I won't spend much time on this, but I've followed this recently and think it's important to know. I know that every partisan group of every kind - religious, political, whatever - uses whatever they can to support their opinions, but this is, I don't know, wrong? Having any organization that is supposedly promoting morality join hands with a hate group negates their message, in my opinion.

Be All That You Can Be

This is just unbelievable.

Really. Just when I think no act of hatred can make my jaw hit the floor again, someone just has to top it.

This story is about an e-mail exchange between an Army recruiter and a man whom the recruiter found on a job-hunting website. The man is gay, and replied to the recruiter informing her of his opinion of the "Don't Ask Don't Tell" policy (one of the stupidest things I've ever heard of, BTW) and his subsequent opinion of the U.S. military.

And this recruiter - this representative of the military - using her government-supplied military e-mail - sent some of the most hateful, bigoted, racist bile imaginable.

I'm sure, as the post suggests, that the man sent some not-so-pretty e-mails as well. But that's not the point. At all. He was speaking for himself, while she was speaking on behalf of the government and the military.

At the risk of speaking out of turn and not knowing all the details, there seems to be enough evidence here to kick her ass to the curb. And I hope this gets all kinds of media attention.